Thank god! The full moon is passed and so is my PMS. Both of these can be hell on their own for me but when put together, it’s a double disaster. (I wrote a bit for my comedy act about it.)
I knew they were both coming, I chart that shit now, I learned the hard way. I can’t hide myself from the world like a monk during this time. So, I try to stay healthy and focused. Of course anything that happens isn't that big of a deal anyway, I mean during any other time of my life.
Long story short, of course I was in situations that were hard to deal with the last 5 days or so. I never doubted myself, and I am going to continue to do my life my way.
With all those feeling running inside me, this morning after a double disaster weekend, the thought that maybe I would consider dating women came to me. Anyone that knows me will tell you I love men. Not interested in women sexually.
Maybe that’s just a cover up. I have never experimented with women in my personal life. Maybe I have been trying to force myself to want men so much to hide it. I am sure there are a lot of people out there that can shed some light on this subject for me.
Dating women would not be just a sex thing for me. In fact that would be that last thing I would want. I want to see what’s there on an emotional level. Quite frankly sex is sex. I get excited from being with someone when there is an emotional bond.
I think at this point in my life I better check and see if I am batting for the right team. I always just assumed I was. Or told from childhood it was wrong. Yes, that would be more like it.
Keep peeling back the onion, that beautiful light on the inside is getting brighter.